I am very pleased to welcome Julie Buxbaum to Peeking Between the Pages today. I reviewed her latest novel After You yesterday and it’s one of my favorite books this year – you can read my review here. I haven’t yet read her first novel The Opposite of Love but I have my very own copy and will be delving in soon. So, sit back with your cup of coffee, tea or hot chocolate and enjoy Julie’s thoughts today on Where her ideas come from…
The question I seem to get asked most often by readers is, on its face, a simple one: “Where do your ideas come from?” But I have to confess, I hate when this comes up because I never seem to have a decent answer. I wish there were an idea store I could visit each time I sat down to start a new project, or that finding a new book topic was as easy as a quick google. For me, the process–which I’m going through right now as I approach the incredibly daunting task of starting my third novel–is in many ways a subconscious one. I often don’t know where my ideas came from until long after a book is finished.
With AFTER YOU, my second novel, for example, I found myself suddenly captivated by the question of how well we really know the people we love. And once I wrapped my mind around this theme, and realized this was something I felt I could explore in a novel-length project, I started thinking about characters and plot. From there, Ellie Lerner, my main character was born. She gets the unique opportunity to step into the life of her best friend, and see behind that opaque curtain that separates all of us. When her best friend Lucy is murdered, Ellie drops everything–her husband, her career, her entire life in the Boston suburbs–to help take care of Lucy’s eight-year-old daughter Sophie. And in so doing, she gets to see her friend’s life from a whole new perspective, and perhaps learn a lot more about Lucy than she had ever bargained for.
Now that the book is out in stores, and I have some distance from its writing, I realize that a lot of the themes of AFTER YOU came from where I was in my own life when I sat down to start the project. I began thinking about the thematic underpinnings of the novel right around the time that my now-husband and I had gotten engaged. No wonder I was suddenly taken with the question of how well we know those closest to us! Suddenly–despite having known my partner for almost seven years at that point, and having had lived together for almost five–I began to spend hours obsessing about who was this person I had committed to marrying. What did he do during the long hours he went to the office? Where was he really, when I called at noon and his secretary said he was out to lunch? And what about all of the hundreds of details that make up a person? I could tell you his birthday, how he likes his peanut butter sandwiches cut, but I couldn’t have told you his favorite color, the name of his second grade teacher, or his third for that matter. In the wake of a huge commitment, and in the face of a lifelong one, I found that I needed to know everything. My poor husband put up with question after question, let me badger him when he came home from work about the minute details of his day.
Eventually, I gave up the pursuit, and realized something I should have known all along–I knew the man as well as one can know another human being. That there are parts of each of us that we keep hidden from the rest of the world, and sometimes even ourselves. That marriage–that all human relationships–are at heart gigantic leaps of faith.
So I guess the next time someone asks me where my ideas come from, I may just have to say my subconscious. And as I embark on this third book, I know I won’t understand its genesis until much, much later, long after I’ve written it’s final pages. But let’s be honest: an idea store would be nice.
~~~~~~~
Thanks so much for sharing this wonderful guest post with us Julie! I can’t wait for your next novel to come out! I want to be first in line to read it!
GIVEAWAY DETAILS
Courtesy of Julie herself, I have one copy of her novel After You to share with one of my lucky readers. What do you need to do to enter…
- For 1 entry leave me a comment with a way to contact you.
- For 2 entries share your thoughts on this topic of how well you really know someone. Do you think there are just certain things you may never know about those you love?
- For 3 entries blog or tweet this giveaway to spread the word.
This giveaway is open to US & Canadian residents only and I will draw for the winner on Sunday, November 29, 2009. Good luck everyone!
reneesuz82(at)msn(dot)com
I think the only person you can fully know is yourself and possibly a twin….. but even then there are times you're not together. I don't feel that I need to know everything about my spouse… when the need arises, he'll tell me what I want to know.
reneesuz82(at)msn(dot)com
Please count me in
msboatgal at aol.com
I think there is always something you will not know about your partner or spouse. Communication and honesty are key in a successful relationship but everyone has a secret or two.
msboatgal at aol.com
Thanks for the interview. Please enter me for this one! Thanks.
fitz12383(at)hotmail(dot)com
I posted this one on my blog:
http://bookshelfmonstrosity.blogspot.com/2009/11/weekly-monstrosity-giveaway-list-1112.html
fitz12383(at)hotmail(dot)com
I am constantly surprised by the new things I discover about those close to me- family, friends, boyfriend. I do know these people well, but there are always more stories to be discovered.
OOO, I love new authors, and she is new to me 🙂 brooke.malko@gmail.com
I would love a chance to win this book.
joannelong74 AT gmail DOT com
I think there are always going to be some unknown things that come up in our lifetimes. I bet that with most of us there are some things even about ourselves that we just don't comprehend.
joannelong74 AT gmail DOT com
I would love to win this book.
pk4290@comcast.net
I think every one of us has things we hide from others. I agree the only person you can know is yourself.
pk4290@comcast.net
I'd like to be included! tWarner419@aol.com
I don't think there's any way to know everything about a person. And I think it's great that I'm still learning new things about my husband. Keeps it exciting! LOL
I've posted this giveaway in my sidebar.
–Anna
Diary of an Eccentric
diaryofaneccentric at hotmail dot com
Thank you for the entries.
freda.mans[at]sympatico.ca
Unfortunately I have been walked on, so with that said, I have troubles trusting anyone.
If you can't trust your own flesh & blood, who can you trust??
freda.mans[at]sympatico.ca
Tweeted; http://twitter.com/fredalicious/status/5685731386
freda.mans[at]sympatico.ca
I really want to read this book. I love her "the opposite of love." I can't wait to read "After You." Please enter me.
linna.hsu at gmail dot com
This is an interesting discussion. I don't believe any of us completely knows anyone — even ourselves. It is possible to achieve deep closeness and insight, but there will always be closed doors.
I twitted this giveaway: http://twitter.com/madbibliophile/statuses/5688970855
laughingstars66@yahoo.com
I would love to be entered in your draw. Thanks.
wandanamgreb(at)gmail(dot)com
I think some secrets are better left as secrets as long as they don't affect your future with someone. Sometimes, by telling your friend or spouse all your secrets, it can affect your future in a negative way.
wandanamgreb(at)gmail(dot)com
What a wonderful author post. It looks like a great read.
Thanks for the chance to win.
JHolden955(at)gmail(dot)com
Hi,
I'm giving out free jewelry set for book reviews submitted for the following book:
http://mylastread.blogspot.com/2009/11/half-sky-turning-oppression-into.html
Also, I had added your to my blogroll:
http://mylastread.blogspot.com/2009/02/internet-resources-that-are-of.html
I would greatly appreciate if you can add my blog to your blog list.
Regards
What a thought provoking guest post. I'm not sure we always even know ourselves completely – sometimes it's hard to accept our faults and/or our strengths. Please enter me! milou2ster(at)gmail.com
Well, of course I would love to win this.
** I think that there is a secret place that we all keep hidden from others.
Thanks for the chance into this giveaway.
unforgetable_dreamer_always(at)hotmail.com
would LOVE to read this book…thanks for the opportunity.
karenk
kmkuka(at)yahoo(dot)Com
This one sounds great! Thanks for the chance to win!!
areallibrarian[at]gmail[dot]com
I think its hard to ever really completely know someone. There is always something that seems to be held back.
i think this sounds like a real thought provoking book.
i would enjoy reading it.
cjay (at) iavalley (dot) edu
i think there are always things you don't know about another person. sometimes that's what keeps it interesting and fun, that they are always surprising you with how neat they are. (unless its bad things, i guess)
sometimes i don't think we know ourselves that well either.
thanks dar!
cjay (at) iavalley (dot) edu
Please count me in.
simplystacieblog at gmail dot com
I don't think you ever really and truly know everything about another person!!
mlawson17 at hotmail dot com
Count me in!
behapppppppy(at)hotmail(dot)com
And I think there should be certain things that should be kept secrets…but then again, knowing someone completely is never a bad thing either.
behapppppppy(at)hotmail(dot)com
What an excellent guest post! This looks and sounds like such a great book!
April
ajpohren@iowatelecom.net
This looks great! Please enter me!
BethsBookReviewBlog AT gmail DOT com
What a wonderful interview! I loved the book "After You" and reviewed it on my RAINY DAYS AND MONDAYS blog here:
http://laurel-rain-snow.blogspot.com
BTW, Dar, I have an award for you at my OBSESSIONS AND COMPULSIONS blog here:
http://rainysnowyobsessions.blogspot.com
Please count me in!
I've read "Opposite of Love" and really liked it. This sounds like an amazing book. 🙂
carmenalexistsang[at]gmail[dot]com
I've honestly never thought about that… how well you can know someone despite being close to them. Because I guess I know that no one truly knows what I'm like, so it makes sense that I won't know another person to that extent. My friend and I share everything… but I think that the little things I don't know, and the new stuff I learn every day from her is what makes our friendship an adventure. Definitely a thought-provoking topic though. 🙂
carmenalexistsang[at]gmail[dot]com
Yes, an idea store would be great!
No need to enter me, Dar. I'm dropping in to say thanks for the e-mail. I've got this posted at Win a Book for you.
Please enter me to win this one!
jonitathebookchick(at)gmail(dot)com
I am still finding out new things about my husband, even after 8 years of being together. I think that it is wonderful: as long as we are honest with eachother, it's fun to find out little tidbits about his past along the way. I think that it keeps a little mystery in the relationship.
jonitathebookchick(at)gmail(dot)com
I've added your contest to my sidebar over at http://book-chic.blogspot.com
jonitathebookchick(at)gmail(dot)com
I'd love to win this – thanks for the giveaway!
nnjmom at yahoo dot com
I think we can only know someone as well as they allow us to know them. I'm very open with my husband, but there are some things he just doesn't seem to understand about me – not for lack of trying. 🙂
nnjmom at yahoo dot com
I blogged your giveaway here:
http://booksandmovies.colvilleblogger.com/2009/11/14/the-sunday-salon-november-15-2009-the-bookish-links-for-saturday-on-sunday-edition/
Thanks!
nnjmom at yahoo dot com
Hi Dar, there's no need to enter me for this giveaway. I'm popping by to say hello to you and Julie Buxbaum. 🙂
AFTER YOU sounds wonderful.Please enter me in the giveaway.augustlily06(at)aim(dot)com.Thank you.
I would love to win this book.
cherylbaryl@hotmail.com
The book sounds great, and I loved the post. Thanks for this possibility.
bgcchs(at)yahoo(dot)com
I don't think you ever know anyone completely, although there are times when we mistakenly think we do. Heck, there are even times we don't understand ourselves.
bgcchs(at)yahoo(dot)com
This sounds like a great story. Would love the chance to read it. Please count me in. :0)
Thanks!
librarygrinch at gmail dot com
Hey Dar,
Would love to win this book!
I am a follower
I posted it on my blog.
forevereading at gmail dot come
I've been married for 12 years and my personal feelings are that to know everything about a person, even your spouse, isn't really a need for me. Unless it's something that is bad, illegal or just morally corrupt. Leaving some things a mystery and private is OK with me. I just don't feel the need to know "everything" about a person–most especially a good person 🙂
Thank you, Gayla
unfussy2@gmail.com
http://unfussyliving.blogspot.com/
This sounds like a great book to read. Love to win.
RJB
loki304[at]tds[dot]net
Great interview! I find it really interesting that she sometimes has a hard time coming up with ideas for her books because it seems as though that part would be the easy part! I would love a chance to win a copy of the book, so please enter me in the giveaway!
zibilee(at)figearo(dot)net
I am also a follower of your blog.
I just found your blog and love it. I don't think you ever truly know everything about somebody because people like their secrets. Even my identical twins who know everythin about each other still have a secret ot two!
Oooops forgot to leave my email:
lady.graeye(at)gmail(dot)com
This sounds great! Thanks for the chance!!
christinbanda at yahoo dot com
Great interview! I think there are always things you will not know about the people that you love. Especially as everyone is viewed a little different by all of the people that you come into contact with!
My email address is laarlt78(at)hotmail(dot)com.
Thanks!
Great interview and have retweeted on @froggyfitz
I blogged about the contest here.
joannelong74 AT gmail DOT com
Great interview. I'd love to read this one.
dlodden at frontiernet dot net
I think most people put on a front, even in their close relationships, so they cover up their shortcomings.
dlodden at frontiernet dot net
Please include me in your giveaway. Thanks!
mtakala1 AT yahoo DOT com
I think everyone has a few things that they won't discuss. A good relationship is very open, but probably never total disclosure.
mtakala1 AT yahoo DOT com
Sign me up please-as a lawyer I love fellow attorneys who do something different-and yes there is some envy-quit work , great advance, writing books, living in London. thank you
I firmly believe you do not always know everything about another person-that is fine-not everything needs to be shared.
cococroissants
peekingbetweenthepages.blogspot.com/2009/11/guest-post-giveaway-with-julie-buxbaum.html giveaway for After You
oops I had forgotten my email-here it is
chocolate and croissants at yahoo dot com
This book sounds fascinating! And sometimes people don't even fully know themselves, let alone another person. Aitmama {{ta}} gmail {{tod}} com
ha. combined my 2 entries into one…
Please enter me in this giveaway!
saemmerson at yahoo dot com
Sarah Emmerson
I think there are many things a person cannot, and may not, ever know about another person, no matter how close one feels to them. Although I have spent my entire life living with my family, I sometimes feel as if we are a family of strangers.
saemmerson at yahoo dot com
Sarah Emmerson
I tweeted:
https://twitter.com/saemmerson/status/5971425912
saemmerson at yahoo dot com
Sarah Emmerson
Count me in Please.
RJB
loki304[at]tds[dot]net
I just added After You to my to-read list today 🙂
alitareads[at]gmail[dot]com
Please enter me!
allygotts567 at hotmail dot com
Of course, I think everyone has something they keep to themselves no matter what.
allygotts567 at hotmail dot com
I am a new follower, love your blog! Please include me in this giveaway.
alongtheway(at)telus(dot)net
AFTER YOU sounds wonderful.Please enter me in the giveaway.augustlily06(at)aim(dot)com.Thank you.
After 25 years together (almost 21 as husband and wife), sometimes I think I know my hubby too well. Other times, I'm glad we can't read each other's mind! 😉
I'll add this to my Up for Grabs post.
wanda_waiting[@]hotmail[.]com
Please include me in your drawing. And thank you for offering it to us.
I've been married almost 20 years…and am surprise when I find out something new about my husband. I'm pretty sure that I don't know everything about him… and likewise… sometimes I can even surprise myself with new things I discovered about me.
You can reach me through my blog: http://angiebeth.blogspot.com or my email which is angiedasner@yahoo.com
Thanks so much
I would so love to win this book!
readingatthebeach at gmail dot com
I don't think you can truly know someone, not even yourself. We all have things about ourself that we don't willingly tell others. We all could get into situations that may cause us to do something really out of character. I don't think any one can say 100% that "I wouldn't do that!" because you never know how you'll react to a situation until you are actually faced with that situation. I don't think it's a bad thing to not know every little thing about someone. I think there are lots of things that would be TMI and would cloud a very good relationship.
readingatthebeach at gmail dot com
I posted this giveaway on my sidebar HERE
readingatthebeach at gmail dot com
Thank you so much for the chance to win this book!
megalon22{at}yahoo{dot}com
I think there are always things you don't know about those you love. Not necessarily that secrets are kept in a relationship – just that people, in general, have memories that are private.
megalon22{at}yahoo{dot}com
Please enter me. Thanks!
kristinemarie7 at gmail.com